At 12am on the 25th of
December I woke up to find the Christmas tree lights still on, my battery
operated candles still flickering and my television still blaring. I had
unintentionally fallen asleep on top of my slick bed cover in my slick nightgown.
As I got up, still sleepy, my mind was not only filled with what needed to be
switched off etc but my heart was filled with great sadness at the thought that
this would be the first Christmas without Dad.
Concentrating on getting off the
bed safely did not even feature.
Before I knew it my
feet had slipped out from under me and I had slid off the bed and landed on my
right side on the floor. Somewhere on my way down I had heard a loud
snap. My left arm was in pain and I guessed that I had broken it though being
my only functioning arm, I prayed that it was only dislocated.
I lay on the carpet
for an hour, struggling to get myself up. However, as I lay there I
experienced a deep sense of God's Peace. Since Dad's death in September,
I had been so busy trying to help Mum, deal with the estate, fight
insurance companies who were refusing to pay out, in short, I was so busy
chasing my own tail that my relationship with the Lord hardly existed.
Lying on the carpet I knew without a doubt that my Lord had an appointment with
me. He had taken the time to throw me a curve ball, I knew that I was embarking
on a journey that would redirect my focus back to Him.
I felt incredibly
loved by my Lord. Isaiah 57:15 “ For thus says the One who is high and lifted
up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy:
"I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a
contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the
heart of the contrite."
Eventually, I managed
to curl my feet around the legs of my bedside table and use my stomach muscles
to pull myself up into a sitting position. From there I was able to pull
my cellphone off the bed and call the Raley's, amazingly using my “useless”
right hand to make the call.
Over the past 4 years
I have become very close to the Raley family. They are one of the
families who live close by and who have a set of keys to my flat.
Mark and Alicia took
me to the hospital and by 3am I had been booked in and scheduled to be operated
on in the morning. X-rays showed that my humerus had fractured badly and
that I needed a plate and screws. I was devastated!
Such a bad break to
my left arm meant that my independence was at risk. For
the rest of that night and into the following day I purposed to take every thought
captive, refusing to allow fear of what the future could hold to overtake me. Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is
honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is
commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise,
think about these things."
I was eventually wheeled
into the theatre holding room with Mark and Alicia beside me at around 2pm on
Christmas day. They had brought a couple of Christmas gifts that had been
under my tree for me to open. I was extremely uncomfortable because I had
been lying in the same position since I had been admitted the night before.
Changing position required the use of my left arm which was broken and it was
difficult for others to help me. There
was much laughter as I tried to open the gifts with “useless” my right hand.
Two hours later, on my
way back from theatre, still groggy I was overwhelmed to find Alicia waiting
for me in my ward. I felt extremely loved. The operation had gone
well and I came out with a plate and 8 screws.
I stayed in hospital
for 4 nights.
Though the nurses couldn't seem to grasp the fact that my
left arm was broken, my right arm is nonfunctional and that I actually needed
feeding etc. I had a wonderful team of church family who took turns at meal
times to visit and feed me. On Sunday, December 27th, The Raley's showed up with a flask of American coffee and a church sermon to listen to that morning.
For the first month
after my operation I stayed with Basil and Annette, very close friends of mine.
This family embraced me as one of their own.
Annette being a qualified nurse was able to give me the nursing I needed
during the early days after my op. I was completely dependent on her
for everything from simply getting up off the bed, bathing, brushing my
teeth, feeding, literally everything. The only thing I could do was sit in a
comfy chair with my tablet and the Word of God (turning the page simply by
swiping the screen was an accomplishment in itself). This is exactly where I needed to be, hours
in His Word and in prayer.
I could not even check
my emails, couldn’t follow up on Dad’s estate, couldn’t check up on Mum and her
finances. All I could do was sit at the
feet of Jesus. Though this was a time of
anguish, great uncertainty about the future, having to swallow my pride and
accept help from everyone around me, it was a time of rest and a time of sweet
fellowship with my Lord. It was a time
that I would not exchange for anything in the world.
Everyday was a
celebration as pieces of my independence slowly returned to me. Amazing how we take the simple act of getting
up off the bed for granted, the joyful privilege of dressing oneself, the
privacy of being able to use the bathroom independently!
The bone in my arm has
healed well but the Radial nerve was bruised when I fell and as a result I have
a “drop wrist” which means that I don’t have wrist function and very little
finger function in my left hand. Recovery
of the nerve is an extremely slow process.
I have experienced the
Lord’s incredible providence through my Specialist, Physiotherapist and
Occupational therapist. All three insist
on seeing me on a regular basis completely free of charge. I have seen the Lord’s kindness through
various people who transport me to my appointments.
Since late January, I have
been living with the Raley’s. Although in
the beginning I was still very dependent, I was yet again made to feel part of
the family. Their house is spacious and perfect for me to be able to use my
electric wheelchair on days when I am particularly tired. Mark took the time to build a ramp so that I
can get into the house with my electric wheelchair.
While all the work was going on Alicia, Annette and I took some time to relax in the pool!
He also put a rail in the
shower so that I could shower independently.
Alicia is very sensitive to my needs and is always available to help,
she knows that the ultimate goal is for me to regain my independence and move
back into my flat and so she does whatever she can to help enable me to
accomplish more and more on my own.
Mark has taken charge
of my home therapy which includes electrode treatment. We have all had many moments of great
laughter during therapy, moments of absolute joy when we see slightest signs of
wrist movement. We have also had times
of despondency and disappointment when it seems as if there is no improvement. But these times drive us all back to our
knees in prayer and remind us that God is Sovereign, His timing is not ours,
His Will is not always our will but His promise to never leave us is sure.
At times I become
impatient, wanting my recovery to speed up so that I can go back to full independence
but I realize that this time with the Raley’s is a very special gift from the
Lord. I am truly enjoying the experience
of being part of a loving family, a God-fearing family and I pray that He will
use me in their lives as much as He is using this family in my life.
